More sex is the secret to a longer, healthier life
Sex is anti-aging, immune-boosting and stress-reducing to name a few of the health benefits. Here are six reasons to spend more time between the sheets.
There is an anti-aging, immune-boosting, stress-reducing, mood-enhancing and hormone- balancing secret out there—and it’s not just for the stars! It’s sex. Did you know that having regular sex will give you a host of physiological and psychological benefits? Here’s why:
1. It’s a natural pain reliever: Sex causes increased production of oxytocin, which is often referred to as the “love hormone”. Before orgasm, oxytocin, released from the brain, surges and is accompanied by the release of endorphins, our natural pain-killing hormones. The area of the brain involved in pain reduction is highly activated during arousal and endorphins are released; endorphins soothe nerve impulses that cause menstrual cramps, migraines or joint pain. Oxytocin also affects the way we feel, helping us form strong emotional bonds as well as reduce pain. According to a study by Beverly Whipple, professor emeritus at Rutgers University and a famed sexologist and author, when women have an orgasm, pain tolerance threshold and pain detection threshold increases significantly, by up to 74.6 percent and 106.7 percent respectively.
2. It’s a stress reliever: The endorphins released during sexual intercourse and orgasms are natural mood-boosters and stress relievers. Regular sex can also boost your self-esteem and increase intimacy between partners. For those in a monogamous relationship, studies have found that semen does contain several mood-altering hormones that can reduce depression and elevated mood.
3. It boosts immunity: Endorphins released during intimacy have been found to stimulate immune system cells that fight disease. Researchers have found higher levels of Immunoglobulin A in individuals who have regular sex. Immunoglobulin A is a type of antibody that helps to protect us from infections. It is normally found in high levels in the mucous membranes of the digestive and respiratory tracts.
4. It’s good for your heart: Intercourse, depending on your level of enthusiasm, can be considered aerobic exercise, burning up to 200 calories per session. Among other benefits, women who engage in regular sexual activity with their partners have higher levels of estrogen, which protects against heart disease. Research has found that men who have sex two times per week have fewer heart attacks than those who do not. The hormones released during sex cause an increase in blood pressure and heart rate, and it can engage almost every muscle in the body.
5. It gives you a glow: The glow of good sex is real. Women who have more sex have higher levels of estrogen, which is essential to enjoying healthier, smoother skin. This increase in estrogen also helps to protect us from heart disease, osteoporosis and Alzheimer’s disease. It also promotes the production of collagen, which keeps the skin supple and gives you a healthy glow.
Still not feeling in the mood? If you notice a decrease in your libido, do not let it go unaddressed. Relationship problems, depression, hormonal imbalance or stress can contribute to a lack of libido. Consider supplements to raise testosterone or reduce stress, such as those suggested in my three-step program for hormonal health and wellness outlined in The Hormone Diet. I also encourage you to see your doctor for proper assessment. (Read more)
Ever wonder why you fall dead asleep or get a rush of self-confidence right after you have an orgasm?
It’s because of endorphins, oxytocin and other substances that are released into your bloodstream upon liftoff.
There are a host of sexual chemicals that affect your mind and body during and after sex. Check ’em out.
1. Prolactin
What it does: Prolactin relieves sexual arousal after orgasm and takes your mind off sex. It rises sharply immediately after orgasm in almost everyone. It’s one of the few moments of the day when we men aren’t preoccupied with sex.
How it makes you feel: Prolactin disengages you from sex after an orgasm, allowing you to think of other things besides the naked woman right in front of you. If after sex your mind is flooded with activities and chores you need to accomplish that day, that is prolactin at work. Just imagine how much more progress we could all make in our lives if they pumped this stuff into the water supply.
2. Oxytocin
What it does: Secreted by the pituitary gland, oxytocin stimulates the prostate, causes muscle contractions and sensitizes nerves. Research has shown that increased oxytocin produces more intense orgasms.
How it makes you feel: Oxytocin is known as the “cuddling hormone” because it causes you to feel a connection and bond with your lover. It’s also found in women’s breast milk, helping to create a bond between baby and mother.
If you enjoy cuddling with your girl after sex, chances are you know the effects of oxytocin well.
3. Endorphins
What they do: Endorphins are a group of neurotransmitters formed within the body that bind to opiate receptor sites in your brain to naturally relieve pain. The bio-chemicals acetylcholine and dopamine are known as endorphins, and have a similar chemical structure to morphine. They are also known to lower stress and boost confidence.
How they make you feel: Endorphins produce feelings of euphoria and pleasure, and they have a calming effect. They fill you with a sense of well-being and relaxation. They may also make you feel dizzy and drowsy, and you might even drift off to sleep. Doctors have suggested that over-stimulation of the opiate receptors, as with heroin use, causes a depressed sex drive.
So next time your woman hassles you over passing out post-sex, you know it’s the endorphins at work. In fact, you can even argue that the faster you fall asleep, the better the sex was.
Of note, endorphins are released by your brain during sex, sporting activities, skydiving, fights, grievous injuries, and almost any other exhilarating activity you partake in.
Get your adrenaline, among other things, pumping… (Read more)
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It’s a natural pain reliever: Sex causes increased production of oxytocin, which is often referred to as the “love hormone”. Before orgasm, oxytocin, released from the brain, surges and is accompanied by the release of endorphins, our natural pain-killing hormones
Where does the word “television” appear in our SA literature?
“11th Tradition: Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, films, and television.” (SA WB pg. 7)
“Sex Objects. Persons of the same or opposite sex, including our own bodies. Almost anything about them can serve as triggers…
Media. Pictures, printed matter, ads, television and movies, music, and dance. Various places, from bars and dance halls to the streets, marketplaces, and showplaces of the city may also be considered media in the sense of what they communicate to us.
The Inner Landscape. Most of us can see how memories and fantasies can act as triggers. Intangibles we are likely to identify on our own are such things as failure, rejection, or criticism.” (SA WB pg. 33)
“What’s so wrong with sex? It’s God-given! People ask similar questions about the use of television, movies, music, etc. Usually those of us trying to rationalize our addictions are the ones coming up with these responses.” (SA WB pg. 39)
“So only I knew that I was wrong and that the cause of my disturbance was me. I had been binging on food and television ever since it happened for no apparent reason. I couldn’t even pray without the scene coming back. What I discovered was that I could not get rid of that memory, and that if I didn’t make it right, I’d have to keep on covering it, coating it over, or drowning it out with something.” (SA WB pg. 99)
“I had finally had it with my wife. She had to get help to change herself-or else! Married to her for years and now sober, I guess I knew when she was all loused up. I had her diagnosed as a television addict, rebellious, blind to seeing herself, and powerless to change. The description sounded disturbingly familiar, but I was too sure of myself to think it could ever apply to me. I had her nailed and felt pretty strongly about the whole thing. It was an ultimatum: Shape up or ship out.” (SA WB pg. 133)
“Stop feeding the obsession. This meant eliminating from what was under my control all printed and visual materials and other symbols of my tyranny. I had to stop feeding my lust by looking around, in my use of television, movies, and music; and by using and listening to the language of lust. I also had to stop living only and always inside my own head. That’s one of the great fringe benefits of going to a lot of meetings. Most of us sexaholics really live on the inside of our heads; we’re seldom in the real world.” (SA WB pg. 158)
Tips to improve the quality of your Relationship
1. Have boundaries set around your immediate or nuclear family. Have individual, couples & family time built into your routine and redefined lines of connection with each spouse’s family of origin. This means you have clear boundaries around how much time you spend with your parents/extended family and your spouses parents/extended family. Your couple’s relationship and family must be the first priority.
2. Touch each other often. Have a good connection around non-sexual physical touching, hand holding, kissing hello & goodbye, laying together, sitting on the couch next to each other. Establish a routine to kiss hello when arriving home and goodbye in the morning when parting for the day.
3. Say I love you to one another. Hearing this is reassuring about the way your partner feels about your relationship. It’s a small gesture that can keep your connection alive. Call each other during the day to say it if you miss your chance in the morning.
4. Have regular physical intimacy dates. Having an ongoing sexual relationship in your marriage is important. Couple in their 20’s average relations 2-4 times a week, couples in their 30’s twice per week, 40’s & 50’s once to twice per week. Pay attention to the frequency so as you aren’t being sexual less than twice per month and slipping into a routine that doesn’t give priority to connecting in a physical way. Maintaining your physical connection gives your marriage staying power and protects it from the stresses of life. Create time either spontaneously or planned, to follow through with regular sex and intimacy. Your sexual relationship should be a tension reducer, not a tension producer.
5. Compliment your partner in front of other people. Not only is it a nice thing to do, it helps your partner feel a deep sense of attachment to you as well as builds their self-esteem. It’s also good modeling for your children to see you being complementary to one another.
6. Every so often, have sex using a different sexual script. By mixing up your usual order of kissing, foreplay and intercourse you can reconnect in an amazing way. By initiating mixing up the script you take ownership of pleasure and eroticism in your marriage. Nothing is hotter than feeling desired and having a partner who takes charge of the sexual relationship.
7. Regularly give each other small gifts or gestures of loving and caring behaviors. Write your spouse a loving note, get them a special treat from the store or when you go on a business trip, write I love you in lipstick on the bathroom mirror one morning. By paying attention to this you can help your marriage maintain a ongoing connection.
8. When you are being sexual, open your eyes. Feeling even more daring? Lock a gaze during your orgasm. Doing this involves courage and letting your partner really see you, the essence of true intimacy, in-to-me-see. Your partner will have never felt so loved, connected and prioritized as a moment like this. Better than any romantic getaway any day, can be done at home anytime.
9. Have regular weekly dates to keep your connection alive and have regular weekly couple’s business meetings to discuss ongoing family “business” including the division of roles and household duties, weekly plans and items that need to be discussed in the relationship By keeping these times separated, date night can be about connecting, talking and being physical and organizational “business” night can be about problem solving and collaberating as a team during the week. Read more
