Today on the 730am DSR we experienced another disruption from a recent caller that has a tendency to fly off the deep end. Nevertheless, I find it very interesting listening to him and understanding where he is coming from. I believe the #1 reason why people tend to get upset and/or emotional on the teleconference phone bridge meetings in recovery is because they are not given an opportunity to share and express themselves.
When one addict listens to another addict, that is what recovery is all about. Far too often I hear people get angry on the call because of the background noise. Even people with months and years of recovery. It’s simply human nature and almost impossible not to respond to someone else when they are behaving badly.
But the old saying, “two wrongs don’t make a right” definitely rings true in this situation. I also thought it was interesting listening to how the moderator tried desperately to calm the other distraught caller down and regain control of the meeting.
I can only speak for myself. I’ve been in both situations and know my limitations. I am not a trained therapist nor am I an attorney, but when you use terms like “cease and desist”, I think you might be setting yourself up for failure.
Typically a letter, also known as “infringement letter” or “demand letter,” is a document sent to an individual or business to halt purportedly-unlawful activity (“cease”) and not take it up again later (“desist”). Read more
The prayer of St. Francis says, “Lord, make me a channel of thy peace–that where there is hatred, I may bring love–that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness–that where there is discord, I may bring harmony–that where there is error, I may bring truth–that where there is doubt, I may bring faith–that where there is despair, I may bring hope–that where there are shadows, I may bring light–that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted–to understand, than to be understood–to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life. Amen.” (p. 99 AA Twelve and Twelve, 11th STEP)
Furthermore, I know for myself that I need to constantly work on my Listening skills. Alanon taught me to “listen to learn, and learn to listen”. Here are 3 more articles related to the topic: